"GALAXY GIRL" POPPY PARKER BY INTEGRITY TOYS

December 10, 2024

This crazy thing...

Sigh... To begin a blogpost with a sigh is certainly incorrect grammatically, narratively, and morally. However it's time for me to write about Galaxy Girl Poppy Parker, and she and I haven't had that great of a week together honestly. She's a fantasy type of doll, and I guess what I determined by spending this week with her on display is that I'm just not into that sort of thing. Or at least I'm not into this Poppy in particular.

"I'll try not to take that personally..."

She came out in 2022, and she's still for sale on IT's website, which means they made way too many of her, I think. I bought her last Christmas from IT and I have never opened her, I thought I would save her in box perfectly preserved but then I got the idea to take her out and really spend some quality time with her. After a week of quality time my verdict is "meh..." which is pretty bleak because I usually get excited about and feel some kind of connection to every IT doll I spend some time with.

"I'm just not that kind of Poppy..."

The story that comes to mind with this Poppy is so stale and generic I don't know if I can make it interesting by retelling it but I'll try. She's the initially hostile eventually horny for Captain Kirk alien beauty on Star Trek. She meets the Enterprise crew members on her sandy, red, and rocky planet with two suns at laser-gunpoint. Both are wary of each other. Kirk is famous for his love of exotic women and has to bed the leader of each pretty alien species he meets for some reason; it's his galactic sexual conquest. During the course of the episode Kirk proves his good heartedness to pretty alien Poppy and she proves her trustworthiness and incredible sexiness to Kirk. They end up in a room on the enterprise alone, and pink girl finally succumbs to white guy as they share a closed-mouth kiss filled with inuendo. The camera pans away but you as the viewer know what went down. They made freaky alien love knowing their relationship was doomed from the start and they could never be together. Kirk is doing his part to give hot girl aliens a sexy opinion of human men, the second, secret mission of the Enterprise.

Classic Captain Kirk bait.

Ok let me just say that story is so tired and played out to me. So right away I was not feeling the fantasy. But then you have the monument to insanity that is this Poppy's hairstyle. I've seen what it is supposed to look like, with the curls wrapped carefully around the ponytail and lying flat looking beautiful. But it does not look anything like that serene picture reader. In reality the hair consists of three purposely left out of the pony, good size crazy blue curls that are all going a different way and sticking (and frizzing) out as far as they possibly can get from the head. It makes her look like she just gave birth to Kirk's half human triplets and does not have a nanny. The whole "I'm tired" theme starts at Poppy's insane, totally frizzed out for some reason hairdo and extends down to her expression, which I swear says "I haven't slept, my nipples hurt like hell from breastfeeding, and if I have to change one more diaper, I'm gonna kill somebody".

So tired, she clearly slept in that hair.

What on Planet Poppy happened to your ponytail?

On the plus side for Galaxy Girl is the fact that she's carrying a pretty badass "cross-body bag", so I'm sure that makes her life much easier, as it does for every CBB purse wearer. She famously comes with two pairs of boots, the calf-height and the thigh high. When I first took her out, I immediately put the thigh highs on her and she instantly went bow-legged the moment they were on. Not a very sexy look for a fashion model.

More freedom of movement with these...

In the calf-high boots, she loses that impression that she's riding an invisible horse (or some kind of tamed space monster), and she starts to look a little bit fierce again, if you don't look at her crazy-making hair. She does come with some really nice accessories; her earrings I've never seen on another doll and her bracelets and the triangle ring are always a favorite of mine. Of course, the "cross-body bag" works great on her, as it always does. Her little dress is very plain and simple, it has a couple of cutouts on the sides near the belt to give it some kind of interest, yet it still remains uninteresting. She does come with a magnetic saturn-esque broach that I did not put on her because it would involve undoing the hook and string latch system going all the way down her back. I have sketchy results when I undo the old hook and loops, I can't always get them closed again correctly and the doll's clothes just never quite look right after I've opened them. So my Poppy's cool silver planetary accessory never got applied to her entire getup.

The "cross-body bag" and triangle ring, LOVE!

The not terribly interesting cutouts in the not terribly interesting little dress.

I wouldn't blame my whole negative impression of this Poppy on her lack of broach. She was kind of controversial when she came out because of her pink skin and blue hair. Some people probably passed up on her because of the fantasy element. I wasn't even on the fence about her until I opened her actually, I really liked the promo pictures I'd seen and the whole idea of an alien Poppy Parker seemed so cool. But once I actually got her out and basked in her dolly presence, she fell flat for me. I know there are many fans who love fantasy takes on popular characters like Poppy and adore this doll. Maybe I would have liked it more if it was from Dr Who or had some other science fiction backstory rather than what I can only see as Captain Kirk's tired creepy alien conquest. If you like her, she's still for sale on IT's website so you can grab one easily for the MSRP and bring her back to your home planet.

She rules the galaxy.